The Art of Ghosting

1:42 PM

Are you on some kind of online dating platform? Have you been talking to someone that you really would not like to talk to anymore? Maybe ghosting is the next step for you.

Ghosting is really quite simple. 

Just stop talking to said person. The longer you've been talking to this person, the more gradual you want to do this. For example, if you've been talking for only a day, you can just simply stop replying completely. However, if you've been talking for a few weeks, you should ease into it. Start by delaying your replies. Your response time should exponentially increase until eventually you just completely halt replies. These responses should also become shorter and less involved. If the other party is trying to make plans, give an ambiguous answer by saying you're really busy and that "you'll see". Sometimes, the other party will be smart enough to realize what's going on and help you out by stopping their communications as well. This is the best case scenario. The worst case scenario is when the other person just doesn't get it and proceeds to text you a week after you've already halted all communications. Once you've ceased all communication, you've done it! Congratulations! You've successfully ghosted someone!


Now now now, you didn't think that there wouldn't be any consequences did you?? HAHAHA
(I know this from experience.)

Okay, here are the rules to ghosting:

Rule 1: Remember that it will be REALLY awkward if you ever see this person again.

Don't ghost on someone you know you might see in person unless you're okay with it being REALLY awkward. In terms of online dating, it gets really awkward when you ghost on one of your friend's friends because said person will go mostly go talk to your mutual friend and it will just get awkward.  

Rule 2: Remember that People DO NOT forget. 

Make absolutely sure that you want to NEVER talk to this person EVER AGAIN because you can't go back from this. 

Rule 3: Remember that you will look like an asshole because well... you are.

Think about it, you're choosing to just stop talking to someone for the rest of your life instead of telling them straight-up that you would rather not proceed with your relationship anymore. I'm not judging (since I've definitely been this person); I'm just warning you.

Rule 3.2: Remember that Karma is a bitch.

You are not invincible. I thought I was hot shit for awhile - ghosting on people and never having it done on me. Then, the tables turned. It doesn't feel great. Ergo, make sure this is something you really feel like you should do because Karma will come back and haunt you for this. 

Also, I really hope I don't actually need to mention this because it's just common courtesy. DO NOT BREAK UP WITH YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER BY GHOSTING THEM. THAT'S JUST RUDE. If you've been in a committed relationship with this person, they deserve an in-person break-up. Ghosting should only be for people you've gone a few dates (3 or less) or have just texted. 

Reasonable Alternative to Ghosting


Obviously, you already know this but you're just too chicken to do it which is why you want to ghost. I get it. Confrontation is hard. It's really awkward and usually ends up in tears from at least one of the parties. Feelings get hurt. It's uncomfortable. So why do it? Well, it's the right thing to do. It creates a clean cut and both parties will know the reason you guys don't talk anymore. Also, this way, there isn't any confusion and you won't get a random text from this person a few weeks later. 

Now that you've reached the bottom of this post, I hope that you'll deeply consider your next move in the dating game. May the odds be ever in your favor. 

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  1. Awesome tips.

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